i realised how different i was from a few years ago.

secondary school... somehow it seemed as though sec 1 and sec 2 was almost like primary school. aside from the increasingly difficult schoolwork.

sec 3 was like the turning point in my life. it was one of my best years in guides, and i met some of the greatest people i've ever known. (not that i didn't in sec 1 and 2) i renewed friendships that had waned over the years. i was happy. (not that i wasnt in the previuos years but u get what i mean)

no need to talk about sec 4 because i discovered i was slowly changing. but i couldn't really pinpoint it.

i guess i can now. it's more than the intense passion i have for certain things now... soccer and such. i still hate schoolwork and think of the gates to school as the gates to hell, but that's not the point. yes, when the world cup was on, i was disinterested. not anymore... for certain topics that bothered me in the past, i no longer think of them as bothersome...

when people talk to me about stuff, i've seemed to have lost that certain zest and enthusiasm. i'm not entirely sure if that's a good or bad thing. i get more depressed easily anyway.

because i know that i've got a lot more to lose now than in the past.

some things are too precious to be trifled with.